I am learning that we ,yes we, the ones cheated on, created this, we attracted this to us,and even if there was a chance that we didn???t , He is in a vortex of his own.that no own can understand .What helped me is reading book after book( aubible) Power of the subconscious Mind, to Wayne dyer, to the one who changed my life, Abraham -Hicks It changed the way I look at everything.